[ folding his towel, she wipes at the back of her shoulder the best she can and then starts to press it against her collarbones and breasts. she knows she's going to have a faint pink stain on her skin, but she honestly doesn't mind. it'll go away, just like the open wound on her neck and back. at least both of those wounds for now will remind her of him and his apparent insatiable need to have her.
it'll also remind her of his continuing to trust her when she feels like he shouldn't.
she doesn't want to question him and ask if he thinks he will be. if stefan says he'll be okay in the aftermath of his mother's brutal words, then he will be. she'll make sure of it. she can't help but wonder if how he feels towards his mother is how her daughter feels towards her. but she can't let herself try and find an answer in the relationship of two different people. lily had the choice to keep stefan; katherine never had that luxury with nadia.
she twists her body to face him and arches her neck. ] Did I get it all? [ she still has blood beneath her chin and smeared all over the back of her shoulder, but at least her red neck isn't covered in wet and tempting blood. ]
( he smiles crookedly at her, taking the towel to dab at some errant spots and then letting it drop in between them. he sighs, reaching for one of her hands to play with her fingers while he figures out what to say or how to say it or if he wants to say anything at all. )
Thank you for being here tonight.
( to help steady him with his mother and to be there afterward for the connection he needed. )
[ she rolls her eyes at his comment. she's pretty sure he'd prefer her to smell a little like blood, even though she knows it would be incredibly tempting in the worst way for him.
when he takes her hand, she unravels her legs and lies down on her side to face him. she doesn't particularly want to be sitting and looking down at him tonight, even though his expression of gratitude makes her want to dive into the shower. being thanked is something katherine will have to get used to, won't it?
she shrugs a shoulder, wanting to downplay its meaning. ] Where else would I be? [ if he had gone through seeing lily by himself, she doubts she would've gotten at least half of what happened. hopefully being with him reminded him that lily was only one fish in a densely populated pond.
she glances down at his bare shoulder. ] You can talk to me about her if you want. Or not.
( he holds her fingers under his and then laces them together for a second before sighing. )
I don't know a lot about her. Caroline...made me turn off my humanity a little while ago. She threatened my only living relative and I did it to stop her from dying. My mother was the one who brought me back. She told me she searched everywhere, scoured the planet.
( he sighs and shakes his head. ) It wasn't true. She never looked. I'm glad she was able to get me to come back because I don't know what other triggers I'd have had at that point but it was all a lie.
[ she can't help her facial expression when he reveals everything. she frowns, very clearly judging and trying to picture everything he describes. mystic falls has changed so much since she last breezed into town. as much as she wants to ask him to clarify caroline and the no humanity situation, she doesn't think it's important. she also doesn't care in this moment. all she cares about is his mom.
she shifts so that she's a little closer to him and she tucks her arms against her chest. she's very aware both of them are physically naked and he's stripping himself bare emotionally. ]
Maybe she didn't look, and maybe what she said she did was a lie. Maybe she turned and she found that new family. But she still turned up twice for you. That has to count for something. [ she shakes her head. ] I don't think it was a complete lie.
( he's just not sure what it is right now. he's not sure if it means something significant or if she was feeling guilt and she wanted to absolve herself. he's not sure if he wants to believe the best or the worst.
he sighs and closes his eyes. )
I don't know what it is yet. I just...don't know what I want to think about her or why she was here.
[ her eyes narrow slightly in disbelief. ] Isn't it obvious? [ it is to her. katherine may not be able to relate to lily and her weakness in not fighting tooth and nail to have her sons with her, but she does understand what it's like not being able to express herself or understand why she's doing something that feels completely out of character.
she squeezes his hand in hers, shifting on the best so she's a little closer to him. gently, ] She wanted to see you, Stefan.
Why now? She had time to see me back in Mystic Falls. I wanted her to want me and she didn't want me then. What would change now?
( he can't help sounding wary and unsure. he doesn't even know if his mother loves him anymore. maybe she wanted closure and to hear him forgive her but he couldn't do that. that wound had cut deep and he wasn't ready to make amends. )
I don't trust her. I don't trust that this wasn't all a lie. Or something to make herself feel better.
I think your mother is many things, but being so oblivious isn't one of them.
[ maybe she covered her eyes back when she was human. perhaps she does it even now. but lily had a choice to show herself to stefan tonight, and she did it. why would someone who had survived giuseppe salvatore and whatever hell had befallen her ripper-self come all this way just to make herself feel better? she can't be that oblivious to stefan's hurt, and from what katherine had witnessed, she sincerely doubts she is. ]
She would've had to have known how you felt back home. You're not exactly the most unemotional person, Stefan. When someone hurts you, you let them know. And she seemed very... [ katherine pauses, searching for a word. ] available to hear whatever you needed to say to her, even if it made her feel horrible.
( there was more he could say, it was true, but it wouldn't have made a difference. the decisions were made and they couldn't be taken back. his mother had chosen someone else and while he hopes her new family feels loved and safe, it wasn't a feeling he'd ever gotten from her.
so, while he can understand what she's saying, he just can't...accept it. he can't let himself believe anything would have changed if his mother had stayed longer and he'd said what he needed to say. )
I don't really want to talk about her anymore. ( he sighs, giving his head a shake. )
[ quietly, ] Okay. We don't have to talk about her anymore.
[ his issues regarding his mother aren't going to mend overnight, and she doubts he'd be able to find peace regarding lily salvatore without having her here. but she can only hope that he feels a little better, even though she doubts it. she can't fathom not hunting down her family, especially her children, given that she had risked everything in 1498 to find nadia again. she wishes lily had done that for stefan.
sliding over towards him, katherine hooks her leg through his and clutches his hand to her chest. she doesn't particularly want him to feel alone, so all she can do is offer him a physical connection once again. with her other hand, she reaches up to brush her fingers against his hair. she doesn't want to see him shake it again. ]
( he watches her come closer, smile flickering across his face as she does before he glances down at his shoulder. there's still a mark where the wood had pierced but it's healing nicely at this point. )
I think the table got it worse than you or I did. I'll have to clean that up and buy a new one tomorrow.
( since he doesn't want to just eat in his living room all the time. )
[ she hates the fact that she's blushing. it'd been the first time in a very long time that she had broken anything during sex. it's the first time she truly did let go—and she feels a tad guilty that he now has to go and buy himself a new table. to her credit, she doesn't duck her head to hide her face from him. the less attention she draws to her flush, the better. ]
Maybe consider something that can withstand the strength of a 700 year old vampire.
[ since that's them combined. does that imply she wants to do it again? because she actually does. trying to break a sturdy table with him sounds like fun.
katherine lifts her hand to glide her fingers over his shoulder, unable to really stop herself from touching him. she may have his hand in her other hand, but it's not enough. ] I'm sorry about your table. May it rest in pieces.
That'll be the first thing I ask about when I speak to a sales associate.
( the 'if i want to have sex on this table with someone who can break a building in half, will it hold?' that would be a great story to tell when the sales associates tries t throw him out.
he snickers. )
It was a good table. I'm glad we got to enjoy it before we broke it into thoughts of pieces.
I may have led the charge in breaking your table, but I think it's your fault it actually broke. [ she states that as matter-of-factly as possible, with her tone leaving no room for argument. why would he argue with what she plans on saying next? ]
You were very awful in teasing me.
[ and by awful, she means very good, but giving him a compliment that isn't hidden between the lines of what she's saying isn't her being katherine.
have they ever really spoken about sex after having it? it's become this great elephant in the room when it comes to verbally acknowledge it. the elephant doesn't seem to exist when it comes to them physically escalating the situation again. ]
It's my fault? ( stefan scoffs and rolls his eyes but there's amusement in his voice. he thinks it had been both their faults because while he'd started it, she'd been the one to react in a way that broke his table. )
So, what's the excuse for cracking my sink? ( he hadn't really been teasing her then. ) If anyone got teased then, it was me.
[ yes, it's his fault for being her achilles heel. he could've done anything to her on that table and she still would've broken it because he's him. she still would've broken his sink even if he happened to stand behind her and simply press into her. she's becoming awfully easy for him and doesn't really care.
katherine feigns a look of offence. ] You were being teased? [ making a pfft sound, she shakes her head and frowns, ] I thought you were getting a very good blowjob. Am I remembering that incorrectly?
( he coughs, licking his lips because no, that had been an outstanding blowjob just like anytime she touched him was outstanding. he laughs quietly, feeling a blush hit his cheeks. )
It was a very good blowjob. But it's always been like that.
( she knew what she was doing in that department and while he thinks he's still catching up, he likes to hope she likes when he touches her too. )
[ ah, see? how the turntables. katherine doesn't hide her smug smile, liking the fact that he's blushing. she's already feeling incredibly smug at his compliment, his facial expression only adds to her growing confidence. friends definitely do not talk about how to fuck one another, but then their friendship is a special kind of friendship.
she wants to reach out to touch his cheeks and see if his blush is as warm as it's making her feel, but she refrains from doing so. ]
Then I think you're wrong. You weren't being teased. I was. [ she withdraws her hand from touching his shoulder and swaps the hand that's holding his against her chest. propping herself up on her elbow and resting her cheek in her palm, she looks down at him smugly. ] You should've been rougher.
[ now, this is where katherine stumbles a little in her confidence. she could say something that totally puts stefan off or... she could say something that does the complete opposite. what's obvious to her is that he seems to be very fond (or in the habit of) keeping himself in check to the point where he seems to be more in his head than in the moment. she likes the moments where he slips.
she does appear a little sheepish, glancing down at his chest so she can't see his expression. ] It's sexy when you lose control and... move me around.
( even with her, someone who could stop him from hurting her and anyone else, he knows he still holds back. he doesn't know how to change that and how to remove the mental block that's stopping him from fully letting go. )
I've spent years training myself to not lose control so trying to do that voluntarily isn't easy.
Maybe it's time you start training yourself to let go a little and live.
[ for specific things, of course. she doesn't expect him to go out to a club tomorrow night and start biting people for the hell of it. but she thinks that, for someone who has spent over a century reeling himself in out of fear, that he's missing out on the actual training part.
she's not judging him. she's merely pointing out what she thinks is a weakness in his strategy, and one that she believes klaus exploited all those years ago. ]
You can only control so much, Stefan. And when you inevitably lose that control... you need to make sure you've put in place ways to survive through that. Holding back on everything isn't the way to achieve it.
I really don't know how to do that. I've trained. Damon's tried to help me. Other people have tried to help me. I don't —
( he trails off and shrugs, rubbing a hand over his chest. he wants to be able to loose control and not risk turning into a ruthless murderer. but until he figures out a way for that to happen, he has to keep himself in control. )
Until I figure out a way, I think just staying in control as much as I can is the best bet.
to the credit of everyone who has tried to help him, they tried. katherine doubts that they've dug in deep to understand just what it is about stefan that makes him tick differently. knowing damon, he would've slapped a blood bag in his hands and told him that was the bandaid he needed for all of his blood issues. ]
You've never had Katherine Pierce help you try and control it. [ she shrugs, wanting to come off rather flippant. in fact, she feels a bit nervous saying so. she knows exactly what she's offering and she doesn't particularly want to be rejected. ] I'm just saying.
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it'll also remind her of his continuing to trust her when she feels like he shouldn't.
she doesn't want to question him and ask if he thinks he will be. if stefan says he'll be okay in the aftermath of his mother's brutal words, then he will be. she'll make sure of it. she can't help but wonder if how he feels towards his mother is how her daughter feels towards her. but she can't let herself try and find an answer in the relationship of two different people. lily had the choice to keep stefan; katherine never had that luxury with nadia.
she twists her body to face him and arches her neck. ] Did I get it all? [ she still has blood beneath her chin and smeared all over the back of her shoulder, but at least her red neck isn't covered in wet and tempting blood. ]
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( he smiles crookedly at her, taking the towel to dab at some errant spots and then letting it drop in between them. he sighs, reaching for one of her hands to play with her fingers while he figures out what to say or how to say it or if he wants to say anything at all. )
Thank you for being here tonight.
( to help steady him with his mother and to be there afterward for the connection he needed. )
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when he takes her hand, she unravels her legs and lies down on her side to face him. she doesn't particularly want to be sitting and looking down at him tonight, even though his expression of gratitude makes her want to dive into the shower. being thanked is something katherine will have to get used to, won't it?
she shrugs a shoulder, wanting to downplay its meaning. ] Where else would I be? [ if he had gone through seeing lily by himself, she doubts she would've gotten at least half of what happened. hopefully being with him reminded him that lily was only one fish in a densely populated pond.
she glances down at his bare shoulder. ] You can talk to me about her if you want. Or not.
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( he holds her fingers under his and then laces them together for a second before sighing. )
I don't know a lot about her. Caroline...made me turn off my humanity a little while ago. She threatened my only living relative and I did it to stop her from dying. My mother was the one who brought me back. She told me she searched everywhere, scoured the planet.
( he sighs and shakes his head. ) It wasn't true. She never looked. I'm glad she was able to get me to come back because I don't know what other triggers I'd have had at that point but it was all a lie.
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she shifts so that she's a little closer to him and she tucks her arms against her chest. she's very aware both of them are physically naked and he's stripping himself bare emotionally. ]
Maybe she didn't look, and maybe what she said she did was a lie. Maybe she turned and she found that new family. But she still turned up twice for you. That has to count for something. [ she shakes her head. ] I don't think it was a complete lie.
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( he's just not sure what it is right now. he's not sure if it means something significant or if she was feeling guilt and she wanted to absolve herself. he's not sure if he wants to believe the best or the worst.
he sighs and closes his eyes. )
I don't know what it is yet. I just...don't know what I want to think about her or why she was here.
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she squeezes his hand in hers, shifting on the best so she's a little closer to him. gently, ] She wanted to see you, Stefan.
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( he can't help sounding wary and unsure. he doesn't even know if his mother loves him anymore. maybe she wanted closure and to hear him forgive her but he couldn't do that. that wound had cut deep and he wasn't ready to make amends. )
I don't trust her. I don't trust that this wasn't all a lie. Or something to make herself feel better.
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[ maybe she covered her eyes back when she was human. perhaps she does it even now. but lily had a choice to show herself to stefan tonight, and she did it. why would someone who had survived giuseppe salvatore and whatever hell had befallen her ripper-self come all this way just to make herself feel better? she can't be that oblivious to stefan's hurt, and from what katherine had witnessed, she sincerely doubts she is. ]
She would've had to have known how you felt back home. You're not exactly the most unemotional person, Stefan. When someone hurts you, you let them know. And she seemed very... [ katherine pauses, searching for a word. ] available to hear whatever you needed to say to her, even if it made her feel horrible.
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( there was more he could say, it was true, but it wouldn't have made a difference. the decisions were made and they couldn't be taken back. his mother had chosen someone else and while he hopes her new family feels loved and safe, it wasn't a feeling he'd ever gotten from her.
so, while he can understand what she's saying, he just can't...accept it. he can't let himself believe anything would have changed if his mother had stayed longer and he'd said what he needed to say. )
I don't really want to talk about her anymore. ( he sighs, giving his head a shake. )
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[ his issues regarding his mother aren't going to mend overnight, and she doubts he'd be able to find peace regarding lily salvatore without having her here. but she can only hope that he feels a little better, even though she doubts it. she can't fathom not hunting down her family, especially her children, given that she had risked everything in 1498 to find nadia again. she wishes lily had done that for stefan.
sliding over towards him, katherine hooks her leg through his and clutches his hand to her chest. she doesn't particularly want him to feel alone, so all she can do is offer him a physical connection once again. with her other hand, she reaches up to brush her fingers against his hair. she doesn't want to see him shake it again. ]
How's your shoulder?
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( he watches her come closer, smile flickering across his face as she does before he glances down at his shoulder. there's still a mark where the wood had pierced but it's healing nicely at this point. )
I think the table got it worse than you or I did. I'll have to clean that up and buy a new one tomorrow.
( since he doesn't want to just eat in his living room all the time. )
Maybe something reinforced this time.
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Maybe consider something that can withstand the strength of a 700 year old vampire.
[ since that's them combined. does that imply she wants to do it again? because she actually does. trying to break a sturdy table with him sounds like fun.
katherine lifts her hand to glide her fingers over his shoulder, unable to really stop herself from touching him. she may have his hand in her other hand, but it's not enough. ] I'm sorry about your table. May it rest in pieces.
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( the 'if i want to have sex on this table with someone who can break a building in half, will it hold?' that would be a great story to tell when the sales associates tries t throw him out.
he snickers. )
It was a good table. I'm glad we got to enjoy it before we broke it into thoughts of pieces.
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You were very awful in teasing me.
[ and by awful, she means very good, but giving him a compliment that isn't hidden between the lines of what she's saying isn't her being katherine.
have they ever really spoken about sex after having it? it's become this great elephant in the room when it comes to verbally acknowledge it. the elephant doesn't seem to exist when it comes to them physically escalating the situation again. ]
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So, what's the excuse for cracking my sink? ( he hadn't really been teasing her then. ) If anyone got teased then, it was me.
( with her encouraging the biting and all. )
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katherine feigns a look of offence. ] You were being teased? [ making a pfft sound, she shakes her head and frowns, ] I thought you were getting a very good blowjob. Am I remembering that incorrectly?
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( he coughs, licking his lips because no, that had been an outstanding blowjob just like anytime she touched him was outstanding. he laughs quietly, feeling a blush hit his cheeks. )
It was a very good blowjob. But it's always been like that.
( she knew what she was doing in that department and while he thinks he's still catching up, he likes to hope she likes when he touches her too. )
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she wants to reach out to touch his cheeks and see if his blush is as warm as it's making her feel, but she refrains from doing so. ]
Then I think you're wrong. You weren't being teased. I was. [ she withdraws her hand from touching his shoulder and swaps the hand that's holding his against her chest. propping herself up on her elbow and resting her cheek in her palm, she looks down at him smugly. ] You should've been rougher.
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( he'd bitten her and bruised her and he's not sure how he could be rougher than that without hurting her. so frowns, looking thoughtful. )
How could I have been rougher?
( stefan's honestly curious and hopeful that she'll just tell him and not tease him and say he had to figure it out himself. )
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she does appear a little sheepish, glancing down at his chest so she can't see his expression. ] It's sexy when you lose control and... move me around.
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( even with her, someone who could stop him from hurting her and anyone else, he knows he still holds back. he doesn't know how to change that and how to remove the mental block that's stopping him from fully letting go. )
I've spent years training myself to not lose control so trying to do that voluntarily isn't easy.
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[ for specific things, of course. she doesn't expect him to go out to a club tomorrow night and start biting people for the hell of it. but she thinks that, for someone who has spent over a century reeling himself in out of fear, that he's missing out on the actual training part.
she's not judging him. she's merely pointing out what she thinks is a weakness in his strategy, and one that she believes klaus exploited all those years ago. ]
You can only control so much, Stefan. And when you inevitably lose that control... you need to make sure you've put in place ways to survive through that. Holding back on everything isn't the way to achieve it.
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( he trails off and shrugs, rubbing a hand over his chest. he wants to be able to loose control and not risk turning into a ruthless murderer. but until he figures out a way for that to happen, he has to keep himself in control. )
Until I figure out a way, I think just staying in control as much as I can is the best bet.
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to the credit of everyone who has tried to help him, they tried. katherine doubts that they've dug in deep to understand just what it is about stefan that makes him tick differently. knowing damon, he would've slapped a blood bag in his hands and told him that was the bandaid he needed for all of his blood issues. ]
You've never had Katherine Pierce help you try and control it. [ she shrugs, wanting to come off rather flippant. in fact, she feels a bit nervous saying so. she knows exactly what she's offering and she doesn't particularly want to be rejected. ] I'm just saying.
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